Hand of Rock - History of the Corna

Here follows the truth. Yes, you heard me, the actual real happenings of what actually happened. No lie is told on this page. It’s for real. I know. I was there.
           
In The Beginning…
…there was a man called Keith. Keith was the first form of life to crawl from the primeval swamp. Most theories say man is descended from apes. This is untrue. We are all descended from Keith.

At this time…
…Keith was the only form of life on Earth apart from a beast called the Wide Eyed Bottom Belching Banshee. This voracious predator had only one source of food: Keith. After some time and lots of instances of nearly being eaten by the beast, Keith decided to make a stand.

One Morning…
…‘that bastard’ attacked. Instead of dodging its long sticky tongue and running away whilst crying like a small girl, Keith stood and faced his foe. The tongue stuck, entrapping Keith’s left arm, and pulled him towards the banshee’s gaping maw. At the last moment Keith unleashed his frenzied attack with his free hand, trying to poke the banshee in the eyes. But so wide were its eyes that Keith had to lift his index and little finger to strike both gooey orbs at once. Fortunately, Keith’s aim was true and his two protruding digits plunged into the banshee’s eyes. Unfortunately for Keith, this caused the banshee to explode.

Although this battle…
…resulted in an end to all known life on Earth (at that time), the heat of the explosion burned a mark into the Rock of the Earth. A sign that was both horned and ominous which remained unseen for millions of years.

Many moons later…
…man discovered this sign, emblazoned in the Rock of Ben Nevis. The man in question was called Ronnie James Dio. He was a singer with large lungs for a body so small. Hmm, he thought. What a fabulous sign. I think I’ll use it to symbolize the music I love so dearly. And thus he did. The rest is history.

In other lands of the Earth…
…the Rock hand has other meanings. In Italian it is the Corna (meaning horns) or Mano Cornuta, horned hand and fare le corna, to make the horns. Originating in Ancient Greece, the Corna is a naughty gesture in many Mediterranean countries and can result in you being beaten up, spat at and bummed if you use it there too much.

If for some reason you find the tale of Keith hard to believe (we can’t think why that would be) or this just isn’t enough information, then look at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corna where you can find out far more information than you would ever need to know about this subject matter and any other you could possibly conceive.